Mindfulness
For some of us, these meditation exercises, "close your eyes, focus on your breath..." are difficult, frustrating, and stress inducing. Particularly for people with a trauma history or ADHD, mindfulness can be a land mine.
For others, the whole enterprise sounds like woo-woo mental health. Add some essential oils and affirmations - who needs therapy or, God forbid, medication?
But there's more to mindfulness than nonsense.
The same Mayo Clinic article identifies several mindfulness practices. Three could be taken as basic concepts:
- Pay attention
- Live in the moment
- Accept yourself
How does that work out irl - in real life?
Let me tell you about my recent five week stay in Costa Rica. First, the back story:
Prozac Monologues
My first book, Prozac Monologues, began with a hypomanic episode during an earlier trip to Costa Rica. I wrote a series of comedic monologues in an effort to not be mindful. The monologues danced around the memory of a recent Prozac-induced traumatic experience. It began with a bizarre thought, and moved on to some other weird stuff: dissociation, thought broadcasting, paranoia, and the like.
Years later, once I was correctly diagnosed with bipolar disorder, I added edgy essays about that experience and everything I learned about bipolar disorder while trying to figure out what the hell happened to my brain. Like many memoirs, Prozac Monologues is a hybrid of my story and my issue. Sheila Hamilton's podcast, Beyond Well, captures it. Here's the link. It's also a great read and now available on audio.
Bar Tales of Costa Rica
So what about Bar Tales of Costa Rica? My second book is exactly what the title promises: the stories I heard while sitting in bars in Costa Rica. That sounds like a very different book. Am I a genre hopper?
Yes and no.
Still, it is a sequel. It picks up where the monologues left off. In the first book, my wife Helen and I thought about moving to Costa Rica. Several months later, we did buy a little house in Playas del Coco. Didn't quite move there, but we spend several weeks there every year.
That's where I continued to work on Prozac Monologues. It's also where I gathered my bar tales, most of them at my sister's hotel and restaurant, the Pato Loco, which means "crazy duck." Other sites included El Bohío (referenced in the first book), Pacifico Beach Club, Coco Palms, and Soda Navidad.
You could call the second book a segue to the first. I turn a corner. That would be a right turn that leads me out of my neighborhood Los Canales, on to the Boulevard de Iguanas, and over to a whole new cast of characters: Patricia, Bruce, Andy, Sydney, Monique and André. Bar Tales is about their stories.
So why is this book good for my mental health?
As I am polishing these tales for publication in the spring of 2024, I spent several weeks in Coco for research. Research.
I wasn't sitting in bars, gathering tales - though inevitably a couple got added to the collection. This time I was gathering sensations. Physical sensations.
Trauma and Sensations
Sensations - these are at the heart of my mindfulness technique.
- The person who has experienced trauma sometimes gets stuck in the past, reliving a loop of troublesome sensations. And let me tell you - being suicidal, as I was, is traumatic.
- Or, in the face of current strife and stress, that person might dissociate - disconnect from present anxiety by going numb.
- Or, based on deeply rooted thought patterns about bad things that happened in the past, the person faces the future with dread, anticipating - and pre-experiencing - a repeat of negative experiences.
Each of these are ways that we lose or escape the here and now. I think of here and now as my worst subject.
The thing is - here and now is where joy lives.
Let me repeat that.
Here and now is where joy lives.
So my research, gathering sensations, experiences in the present, kept me anchored in here and now.
And it filled me with joy.
What color are the rooster's feathers? - bronze head and breast, black legs, wings of teal and red.
What sound do the geckos make? - chk, chk, chk. How about the howler monkey? muffler dragging on concrete!
What do mangoes smell like when they are sitting in the field near my house in the hot sun? - like a fortified sweet wine.
What does carne en salsa taste like? Beef stewed in a rich vegetable sauce with hints of smoke when Juan cooks it all day in an iron pot over a wood fire under the mango tree.
What does it feel like to walk in the surf? Caressing waves, then grit in my sandals.
I walked around town with my phone in my hand, making voice memos, describing these sights, sounds, smells, tastes, and sensations. My mind fixed on the present, there was no room there for regrets about the past or anxiety about the future.
Health Benefits of Mindfulness
Mindful meditation has been demonstrated to reduce anxiety, depression, stress, pain, insomnia, and high blood pressure.
There are many ways to do mindfulness. A review of literature published in Clinical Psychology Review, Effects of Mindfulness on Psychological Health, summarizes the context of mindfulness practice in its Eastern and Western versions and its application in a variety of psychological treatments.
What I offer here is one simplified self-help practice for addressing panic and anxiety, a disciplined version of what I called my research:
Focus on your environment.
- Name five things that you see right now
- Name four sounds that you hear
- Name three things that you feel
- Name two things that you smell
- Name one thing that you taste
The point is to redirect the catastrophizing brain, to pull it into the here and now. Remember - here and now is where joy lives.
This practice isn't the cure all to my mental health issues. And I doubt it will cure yours. But it gives our poor brains, exhausted by the three alarm fires that usually occupy them, a break. It turns down the temperature and lets a different input in.
And that's a good thing.